Sunday, August 2, 2015

"Count It All Joy:" Part II

Really, it's not.
I'm no stranger to being sick. Therefore, I expected some changes to hit my body as I moved further along in my pregnancy. There was nothing a little ginger ale, soup, and crackers couldn't fix. However, the dehydration, low potassium, low sodium, and 24-hour bucket fest was not something I signed up for as a newly pregnant mom. Hyperemsis Gravidarum (HG) is nothing you can fix with home remedies, back rubs, ginger in it's raw form, or even psyching yourself out. No, the sickness is not in the heads of those who suffer. No, just eating to help you feel better is not the answer. No, drinking this or that is not a quick fix. No, the sufferer can't just go to work with a barf bag, keep calm, and carry on. No. No. NO! Those who have been pregnant and actually dealt with morning sickness offer great advice, but no matter how many times HG is explained, the person with great intentions only seem to unknowingly become offensive. I want to shout out Princess Kate for making HG really public and making sufferers look less crazy. She stamped it for us.

The Life of an HG Sufferer

1. HG often requires multiple hospital visits. For those who suffer on the worst part of the HG scale, in-home care is required.
2. HG often requires medication to treat.
3. HG is so debilitating that taking a shower becomes a luxury.
4. HG has put its sufferers out of work and causes financial hardship.
5. HG can subside, but makes guest appearances throughout the entire pregnancy.
6. HG is famous for massive amounts of weight loss.
7. HG will encourage its suffers to disconnect from family and friends for extended periods of time (it is exhausting trying to explain why you don't look pregnant at seven months even though the baby is perfectly fine).
8. HG mostly affects the mom, not the baby.
9. HG SHOULD NOT BE LEFT UNTREATED. It is a medical condition far worse than morning sickness. You don't just "get over it" or eat and drink your way through it. 
10. HG sufferers need support, not criticism.
BONUS: HG sufferers spit a lot. No, we don't want to risk swallowing it because that will begin another vomit fest. Ptyalism Gravidarum (PG) is gross, and I don't want to talk about it anymore.

My Journey

1. Seven documented visits to the hospital (4 were overnight stays) are in my files. I was in the hospital for my birthday. One of my students saw me looking like the Crypt Keeper. She was kind not to judge me. Her pregnant sister was waiting in the ER as well. Bless my husband, AJ, for the many times he took off work to usher me to the hospital. Being wheel-chaired out of the classroom was not a good look, but I am thankful for my school admin team, school nurse, and co-worker L. Shack, for forcing me to go back to the hospital on two separate occasions. Super friends L and L met AJ and I at the hospital to make sure I was okay. My soror J9 took a shift driving me to the hospital while AJ finished up some work. My line sister, Tamu, drove all the way from Jersey just to make sure I was okay after being admitted the first time. My Aunt T came to visit just before my discharge and took me home. Two more line sisters, Doc and FBI, made home visits after being released from my hospital visits. My girl, Whiting came to help me clean up and throw a load in the laundry because I just couldn't move. Counting it all joy. 
2. I went through four different types of medicine. Zofran (click to read more) is the winner. Yes, I saw the commercials about the law suits. Baby is FINE. Seven months in, I'm still on it, but I'm managing. Still counting it all joy. This is the abridged version with some details left out...too much for anyone one human to read.
3. Thanks to my co-worker, Ms. K.C., I learned to struggle through a shower as she put sheets on the guest room bed for me. I am still counting it all joy.
4. God sustained us because I ran out of leave, and I did not have short-term disability. I did not have a full check from April through May. The first full check was seen in June. One check, for two weeks, was less than $200. Most bills were paid. Still counting it all joy.
5. HG gives me about two strong weeks, then I get sick again--that's with medication and staying hydrated. Counting the joy for the good days.
6. I started my pregnancy weighing 168. At the worst of my HG, I weighed 141 (from March to May). I am holding at about 151 at seven months. Pointing out the fact that HG sufferers lost weight or appear small as a pregnant woman is like shell shock to a vet. Don't "do it for the vine." It kind of sends us back into a dark place. I promise you, we weren't trying to lose the weight. Just ask how we're feeling THAT DAY (every day is different). Again, the baby is fine. Counting it all joy.
7. I disappeared from March to most of May. Texting and FB were my primary means of communication to the world. My fingers worked in between vomiting spells all day. I just started sleeping in my bedroom after five months thanks to a generous gift from Mrs. Standish--a body pillow--and deciding to use a tall trash can beside the bed so I don't mess up the floor. Our bed is really high. Stepping out of the bed still presents a challenge. Those who understood/undetstand my disappearances, thank you. I count you in my joy.
8. The BABY IS FINE!
9. I prayed and prayed and prayed when I was at my wits end. I didn't want to have home-care 1. because I needed to go back to work and 2. because I'm not really good with 24-hour IV and such. My doctor was getting ready to recommend steroid treatment to help me at week 15 of my pregnancy which had birth defect possibilities. Although my symptoms were not 100% gone, there was no need for the next treatment level. However, many of my fellow HG sufferers were not so fortunate and remained on bed rest with in-home care.
10. Without my support system, I would have fallen into a deep depression. I was down and out and feeling worthless, but God and constant reminders to pray and be encouraged from family and friends from Connecticut to Abu Dhabi helped me through this ongoing HG journey (I still have it. It doesn't leave). At the risk of leaving any ONE person out, THANK YOU...yes, you (smile). This could get really long if I named everyone.

AJ, you get your own lines. You have been very patient. You have truly taken the "in sickness and in health" vow to another level. I can't imagine being you with all that has happened in our home beyond me. Thanks for your sacrifice. Love you.

I have three months until B.B. arrives. He's moving, kicking, punching, and doing whatever babies seven months in the womb do. I can't hold all the salt because it is apparently needed during my pregnancy, but I am aware of what still goes into my body.

If you should come in contact with a pregnant woman who suffers from HG, please be mindful in your attempt to support her. It is a very sensitive condition and time for her. She might eat foods or drink beverages you're not used to seeing a pregnant woman consume (coffee, tea, Coca-Cola, etc.). She might not be able to eat much of the fruits and veggies she needs because they trigger the vomiting and she'll have to start her management cycle all over again; a lemon ice pop might be the most she gets as a fruit. She has to consume what is called, "SAFE FOODS." She might sleep the day away because movement is a trigger to sickness. Noises--soft or loud--bother her. Smells that are not "SAFE" trigger vomiting. She might not want to go outside to catch the sunshine because the light and heat may cause her to get sick again. Lastly, please don't assume she doesn't want to be helped or want the delicious meal you prepared to assist her. She can have a food item on Monday and by Wednesday it is the worst thing in the world. Her diet is not consistent. So, if you're annoyed, imagine how she feels not being able to know what she can and cannot eat on a daily basis.

Whatever you're dealing with, whether you are a believer in the Word of God or not, please count the joy you do have during your trials and tribulations. I'm looking forward to hugging B.B. in October of 2015 as my tougH Guy.

Hugs and love,
Yolonda

PS: HG has nothing to do with waiting until later to have a child, being stressed, ethnicity, or other causes that might make sense. It is the GREMLIN of pregnancy conditions after midnight.